My moment of freedom

My dad surprised me today by taking Molly for the afternoon.  I dropped her off and realized that I had an entire 6 hours to myself.  No school.  No work.  No baby.  I was tickled.

I went straight to Target to shop.  Though we have no money - I couldn't help myself.  I had to get Molly something for her birthday anyway, so I found my justification.

On my way into Target there was about 45 seconds from my car to the store where I walked with an iced coffee in one hand and a cigarette between two fingers and I remembered what it was like to be a single woman with no children, and I smiled.  It felt really nice.  I love my life.  I would never trade it for anything in the world.  I love my daughter and I have found a great love for motherhood.  This is all so very true.  But it was those few moments where I felt I had absolutely no obligation, no agenda, no responsibility and I felt free.  I am not sure I would ever be able to appreciate that moment of freedom if I hadn't had children.  And in the same moment, I do not ever think I would appreciate the life of my daughter and motherhood if it weren't for the moment where I did not have Dominic.  Nonetheless, it felt really good.

I have cleaned my house and my windows are open as it is 70 degrees in July.  It is absolutely gorgeous out and this weather is definitely my favorite.

Picture page.

I went and saw Willie Nelson in concert.  This photo sucks because of the lighting, but Christi got much better photos.  It was rad to see a living legend live.  My sister and I took my Aunt because she is IN LOVE with Willie.  Aunt Net was a silly little school girl and I am glad we were able to take her for all that she has done for me by watching Molly every single Tuesday without fail since she was born.  She is the best.

Annie bought Mo cowgirl boots.  As a little girl, I was known to tot around the house in only cowgirl boots and nothing else.  Like mother like daughter. 

So, this is happening now.  It's basically one of her favorite things to do.  Needless to say, it is very difficult for me to keep dirty clothes in their hampers.  

Upon reflection, we shouldn't have allowed Molly to play with our phones.  She  now thinks that the phones are hers and takes photos of herself.  (she's not so smart to know that is what she's doing, but photos and Siri have become a daily routine with her).

My friend, Amanda, just moved here from Chicago a few years ago.  She has a little boy named Cash who is 18 months old.  It is within our weekly ritual to go over to their house so the kids can play and the moms can relax.  It is a nice way to decompress.

This is Amanda.  She is a really good friend and a constant reminder of what it is like to be a genuinely nice person and mother.  We are a lot alike and get along great.  It's a good thing we both have children, otherwise she would be my partner in crime.  We both have rotten, but super fun pasts.  We enjoy telling each other our stories.

A Mid-Summer Nights Blog.

I am exhausted.  Thank god that I graduate this year and hopefully find something within my field so that I can stop working at restaurants and give my body a break.  I have been doing this for way too long.

This summer has been crazy busy.

I went to Chicago with Liz one weekend and stayed with Mike.  We went to the Naked Raygun show at the Metro and hung out with the band afterward at the Cobra Lounge.  It was so.much.fun.  Jeff Pezzati and I talked all night long and individually everyone in the band and I, at one point, exchanged photos of our children.  It was pretty awesome.  I woke up with a wicked hangover that lasted nearly 2 days.  It was totally worth it and I have realized that it is only worth it if I am hanging out until 4 am with one of my favorite bands.  Otherwise, I'm too old for that shit.

We went to Indy for a weekend and spent time with Aunt La and Alex.  We shopped all weekend at the Goodwill Outlet and ate wonderful food.  We took Molly to the Indy Zoo and it was super neat.  Having a child is really cool because you're able to relive childhood all over again.  It is these moments with her that I really cherish.

The 4th of July was fun.  We went to Mikes as we do every year and it was really relaxing.  Molly loves to swim - so she had a blast.  Ashley brought Cora so her and Molly were able to play.  It was sweet to watch them interact with each other.

Life is good.  Molly just turned 11 months old yesterday and I cannot believe we will be celebrating her 1st b day soon.  She has grown so fast.  She is cruising all over and babbling like crazy.  I can't wait to hear her little voice.  She says 'mommy' and 'daddy' and it is the best.  She's going to be a firecracker.  She is so independent and at the same time has formed a very secure attachment to those that are close to her - especially me.  I am enjoying the bond that we share and dread the day that she screams how much she hates me.

I work very part time and have had nearly a month off of school.  I am a full time homemaker and am fancying myself to be quite the domestic goddess.  I have been cooking a ton and it feels really good.

There is nothing much else to tell besides the fact that Ray has taken a great liking to unsweetened ice tea and myself to Starbucks' iced coffee.

We're such rebels.